THE ILLUSION OF CONTROL

As women, we often take on the burden of planning.  We plan our family events, sports, activities, meals, and gatherings.  As professionals, we make strategic plans and work to ensure our meetings go off without a hitch.  We look at all the variables.  We work to ensure that everyone’s needs are met.  We long for this magical moment where all the parts of the puzzle converge perfectly. Where progress is made. Where everyone is getting along and enjoying the moment. 

​

Then one thing slips and it all seems to come crumbling down.  Your day goes from feeling calm and purposeful to chaotic and overwhelming.   The reality is that the change, the slip, the faulty piece of the puzzle does not create feelings of overwhelm or disappointment. 

 

Your thoughts do.

 

The shift from thinking that you’re prepared, that you have it all together, to thinking that everything is falling apart IS the answer.  The realization that no matter how much you prepare and try to keep all the balls in the air, you simply can’t control it all is the key.

​

It’s the illusion of control that catches us.  That keeps us in a cycle of busyness.  Of constantly striving for something that is just out of reach. 

​

“You can’t control everything.” We’ve all heard it before.  So why is it so hard to let go?  Why do we spend energy and time working to influence things beyond our control?  What if we spent that time and energy working to manage our own thinking?  To control our own responses?  To drive the results we want in our life? 

​

It’s that simple.  Start with noticing.  Catching.  Grabbing onto those subtle shifts in thinking and looking at them with curiosity.  Notice how one thought can completely change the trajectory of your day.